One year ago today......

One year ago today, we had our first visit with the littles.  Nick was at school and the previous foster family dropped them off while they went to a dr's appointment near our home. I can vividly remember that day. They were shockingly delayed and shells of little people.   S was emaciated and looked shell-shocked and neuro damaged from first glance, A had a meek little smile and was a limp rag, barely holding his head up.  They were 22 mo and 10 mo give or take a few days. It was shocking and scary to say the least. We still like to go back and look at pictures from that day and from the subsequent visits as well as their first days here because it. is. amazing. to see the transformation that they have undergone in one year.  Amazing. Pictures don't really do them justice but I still wish I could do some then and now. Most impressive is their change in personalities.  They were just quiet and non-involved.  I remember putting them to bed early on and it was basically just quiet.  I would wonder what they were laying there thinking about; where they scared, sad, mad? I can promise you they are quiet no more.  They found their voices pretty quickly and the personalities that have emerged are just so fun and curious and adventurous and loving and on, and on.

In the last couple of months with all the "other" drama going on, I have failed to mention all the awesome moments that have frankly made the cancer pale in comparison.  S has begun to chew and will chew almost everything at least one or two times if not more.  It is the most exciting thing ever to watch....probably more of a dietitian excitement....but very cool none-the-less to know that all of the things we noticed, addressed, and treated have helped her to develop the ability to chew.  Cool stuff.
AND, not to be outdone, we have also added another walker to the ranks.  I would not say he is proficient yet but he can take unsteady walks across a room and can stand up from the middle of the floor without anything to hold.  Again, going from where they were when they got here til now has been an incredible journey to watch and be a part of on so many levels.  They have learned to be in a family, to play, to laugh, to sing, and to love.  Hopefully we have developed good healthy attachment and trust so that they can be all that God intended them to be.  We still see biomom every week and now she attends therapies as well.  She still wants to parent.  She will have court at the end of September and I believe at that session they will be making the choice whether to change the goal to adoption and termination or continue with reunification.  The littles by that point will be in state care for over 15months and by law, they need to make this determination. So hopefully, they will do something and just not add months on for her to "change".  I do believe in second chances but not when it would give the littles no chance at a normal healthy stable life. It is in God's hands for sure, there is nothing we can do except defend their cause and represent them at court if we even are allowed.  Supposedly they have a Guardian ad litem who defends for their cause but we have not heard from her or met her so that will be another post for another day because I could go on and on about how disappointed I am in that part of the process. 

I am so thankful on August 15th last year we decided to take a really big risk to foster a sibling set of littles.  I would not change one thing about the journey except maybe Abe's new love of screeching and screaming.  THAT has got to go! We continue to pray for God to allow us to love without worry and risk without fear. It's hard and there have been dark days and may be more in the future but we continue to TRUST that God has it and he is good all the time.

They Love to play with Nick so much and he has obliged them more often than not.

I love to watch them all love on each other, our best accomplishment would be to teach them all how to love God, love who He made them to be and to love each other and those he puts in their paths.  That would be successful parenting in our eyes.

Umm, only in Northern Wisconsin would there be a snowmobile safety and "how to" video at the Children's museum

We are King and Queen of the world, er, the lake!

 

He looks like a teenager in this picture, cute, but oh my!

Nick and his traditional back to school from behind pic with dad and two additions this year.  They each had to have a hand.  LOVE!

And just in case inquiring minds need to know, Radiation did not start this week, long story and not important, so I will start next Monday the 19th and I was randomized to the 6+week standard treatment.  So very ready to get going and get it over with so we can move on. Since I did get the usual longer treatment period, I do have a friend setting up the food calendar this week; so I will post a link and/or email all friends who have inquired about helping us out with food during this time.  Again, God has provided such great support thru all of our journey this summer and we are so thankful.  We continue to be grateful for prayer regarding radiation side effects. Praying for minimal side effects and maximum effectiveness.  Also continue to lift up our family as we approach the court date which could decide whether or not adoption becomes a reality for our littles. Pray that Nick takes all of this chaos in stride and is able to process it calmly and with confidence that God and his family is always for him and always by his side in all the ups and downs of life.  Thanks ahead of time for your continued support and prayers.